I'll never learn

In an attempt to fulfill my fantasies about a hipster with a beard in short shorts and tighty-whities, I took a leap of faith and reached out. To my own pleasant surprise, I got a lengthy response full of promises of future socializing. The very same promises I received a while back when I started noticing hipsters in short shorts and tighty-whities. To my further surprise, a few days later, I receive a third party confirmation of excitement about my reaching out from the said hipster with a beard in short shorts and tighty-whities.

So far, so good.

Of course, in all this excitement, I forgot all of the previous patterns of promises but little follow through.

But clearly, I am a sucker for self-inflicted punishment. Because I reached out again. But prior to any action, I conferred with a friend who agreed that a modern day woman should be able to do whatever she wants rather than adhere to some preconceived and outdated social standards. She also reminded me that many hipsters with beards in short shorts and tighty-whities happen to be boobs. But I chose to ignore that small piece of rather important reminder.

And I got – “Awesome! Let’s hang out soon.”

That’s it.

I guess the bigger question is: where are all the manly-men with no beards who don’t wear short shorts with tighty-whities? I have no clue where to start looking for them.

And a word from the Government

For the three people who read this blog, it's about freaking time! Not to mention, just in time for me to enjoy those short shorts!

FDA News
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
P06-118
August 24, 2006

FDA Approves Over-the-Counter Access for Plan B for Women 18 and Older
Prescription Remains Required for Those 17 and Under

The U.S. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) today announced approval of Plan B, a contraceptive drug, as an over-the-counter (OTC) option for women aged 18 and older. Plan B is often referred to as emergency contraception or the "morning after pill." It contains an ingredient used in prescription birth control pills--only in the case of Plan B, each pill contains a higher dose and the product has a different dosing regimen. Like other birth control pills, Plan B has been available to all women as a prescription drug. When used as directed, Plan B effectively and safely prevents pregnancy. Plan B will remain available as a prescription-only product for women age 17 and under.

Duramed, a subsidiary of Barr Pharmaceuticals, will make Plan B available with a rigorous labeling, packaging, education, distribution and monitoring program. In the CARE (Convenient Access, Responsible Education) program Duramed commits to:

* Provide consumers and healthcare professionals with labeling and education about the appropriate use of prescription and OTC Plan B, including an informational toll-free number for questions about Plan B;

* Ensure that distribution of Plan B will only be through licensed drug wholesalers, retail operations with pharmacy services, and clinics with licensed healthcare practitioners, and not through convenience stores or other retail outlets where it could be made available to younger women without a prescription;

* Packaging designed to hold both OTC and prescription Plan B. Plan B will be stocked by pharmacies behind the counter because it cannot be dispensed without a prescription or proof of age; and

* Monitor the effectiveness of the age restriction and the safe distribution of OTC Plan B to consumers 18 and above and prescription Plan B to women under 18.

Today's action concludes an extensive process that included obtaining expert advice from a joint meeting of two FDA advisory committees and providing an opportunity for public comment on issues regarding the scientific and policy questions associated with the application to switch Plan B to OTC use. Duramed's application raised novel issues regarding simultaneously marketing both prescription and non-prescription Plan B for emergency contraception, but for different populations, in a single package.

The agency remains committed to a careful and rigorous scientific process for resolving novel issues in order to fulfill its responsibility to protect the health of all Americans.

For more information on Plan B and today's action, please see: http://www.fda.gov/cder/drug/infopage/planB/default.htm.

Who likes short shorts?

Ahh Williamsburg, not only did you bring gnarly looking beards to men’s latest fashion but now the trend includes hotpants for men. And let me tell you, judging by the legs I’ve seen at the McCarren Park Pool shows, I like it! Who knew that skinny hipster boys have smooth thighs and wonderfully sculpted calves.

I’ve always been a fan of tighty-whities, which I used to think were actually called tidy-whities until someone pointed out the misfortune of skid marks that seems to plague some men. I was then told that the term “tidy” is inappropriate when applied to snug men’s undies. But back to my point, since it’s virtually impossible to wear boxers with hotpants (I suppose it is possible, but boy, will that look stupid!), one is required to go commando or sport some tighty-whities. Although I suspect it is ill advised to go commando when wearing hotpants because you just never know when lil’ buddy will decide to sneak a peak at the outside world.

Of course, the added bonus to the hotpants is a nice preview of what’s inside them. Hence double the pleasure – hotpants with a preview and tighty-whities. What else could a girl ask for?

Clarification

So apparently there is a minor buzz about me being "head-over-heels in love." The situation is that I am in love, but I suppose it's not in the traditional sense. This slight confusion may be due to me, a foreigner, writing in English.

Or perhaps this is due to a foreigner reading a blog written in English by a foreigner, who knows.

So to clarify, I am completely head-over-heels in love with surfing. Going to the beach and getting beat up by a hard board that's about 10 feet in length is my idea of having an amazingly fun time. I am not that much of a fan of being pummeled by the ocean, I am not really loving salt water up my nose, twisted ankles, or bruises on my knees/hips/elbows. But riding a wave for the five seconds is worth it all. I guess that's what women in violent relationships say. Great. Not to mention that my mother called this a sport for men.

But, just for my mother, below I have several examples of women surfing. One of the best surfers on the beach where I attempt to surf is a woman. She's really good, every time I turn, she catches a wave. Most others, predominantly men, just float about.

Summer time

So in case you were wondering if I am so bummed out about the French World Cup loss that I've sunk into deep depression and can no longer update the blog... well, that's not the case.

The situation is that I found a job. Sort of. It's a short temp thing, chatting with prostitutes. It's right up my alley. And it keeps me super busy.

Additionally, I've discovered and have become head-over-heels crazy in love (not sure if that's the right term to use but heck, it works for me) and addicted to surfing. I've been going every weekend. Well, except for one weekend when I had pink eye. But despite being knocked over by waves, despite getting liters of salt water up my nose, and despite being completely banged up by the surfboard (people are now asking me if I am experiencing domestic abuse...), I love it. Sun, surf, and sand... no, more like drunken boys with a bungalow in the Rockaways. That's where I am spending my weekends instead of updating this blog.

So surf's up. For now.